How'd you meet your girlfriend? She seems really awesome! You guys sound so cute together!
It was an, er, very odd meeting. I had just moved from Ireland to Canada, and I was a mere 15 years old. So I went to this one school for a while, and when I was there, a ton of people ridiculed me because of my accent. While I was trying to work the accent away, it was recess and I went under a tree like I usually did and sat there for the remainder of recess.
So then, this big dude who had more going on in his arms than in his brain walks up, and he starts talking crap before eventually he picks me up by the front of the shirt and pulls his other fist back. So, waiting to be killed, I heard this amazingly vicious "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM!| and I turn to the right to see this red-haired girl running with speed that could match the racers in the Tour De France ON their bikes.
So anyway, he turns to see who yelled it and this girl jumps at this guy, remember that he's about twice the size of her, and just tackles him straight to the ground. So, this girl says she can't fight him because teachers were watching, so she said to meet him in the school's back alley after school.
So, I decided to go back there and watch, and sure enough, the two show up at either side of the alley. They ran at each other, and it lasted, oh I dunno, seven seconds or so before he was on the ground with a broken wrist. Anyways, after he ran away, I thanked her for saving me earlier, told her my name, we became great friends and at some point helped me work off my accent, so I now speak like a North American on instinct, however I can still speak like an Irishman whenever I want.
So, as time went on, we became good friends, we decided to start dating, I ultimately proposed to her and now we're semi-happily married couple. I say semi because most of our conversations go like this:
"You know, you're a good guy, despite never getting your lazy ass off the couch."
Oddly, though, that's when we're at our happiest.
Until, of course, she runs out of insults and just decides to deck me in the face.
Anyways, there's your paragraphs of explanation.